dear middle child

Photo Credit: Sandra

 

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Do you feel like you are always second best? All the neighborhood kids could care less about what you have to say. Especially since they’re glued to every word and every joke your elder sister has to say. Even if the joke isn’t that funny to you, after all she was just your older sister. However, not everyone saw it that way. So you spend most of your time with a sea of people, but you feel completely alone.

Dear Middle Child: You Are Not Alone

When my younger sister came along; she quickly became the “favorite” because she was undeniably so cute. She had such a sweet and angelic voice. I mean only a fool would associate less than perfect words to describe her.

I was sandwiched in between perfection. For a long time, I struggled to fit in. I never really fit in anywhere in school, and I wasn’t the cool kid; nor was I on the cheerleading squad or considered the bookworm (although, I did get amazing grades). Even when I sat with my group of friends, I never felt like I belonged. I didn’t fit anywhere. While experiencing this you begin to wonder: Am I just a void, just wasted space? Yes, I was sitting at the table surrounded by people; however, I wasn’t the fan favorite. Instead, I became the girl who just merely “tagged along.”

I was the mute.

Dear Middle Child: You Have a Voice

You see, I wasn’t that child still trying to make my voice heard, while fighting in the shadows of my sister and other people. However, I never allowed that girl to break free. Instead, I didn’t deal with the issue at hand. The problem I had only grew, allowing others to silence me. I allowed them to silence my voice. I didn’t think what I had to say was important. My voice became smaller and smaller. I didn’t know my worth. I barely knew who I was.

My room was my safe-haven: I stayed there for hours listening to music, speaking on the phone, writing music and poetry and short stories. I did everything under the sun. I semi-envied my sisters because from the outside looking in they had everything. The charm and the social approval.

Dear Middle Child: You Are Creative

Ever since elementary school, I had been drawn to clothing. It was another form of self-expression. In a sense, I think it was a way to show who I was without having to say a word. It worked for me because I never could get a word in, in ANY conversation. So, I let my clothes do all my talking. I began a store where I sold candy to the neighborhood kids and to the kids at school. I wanted to provide for myself early. When I sold candy, I was able to reinvest in my company. And every two weeks, I made it a point to purchase a new outfit. I absolutely loved the freedom it gave me.

As cliché as this may sound to you. Fashion became a positive outlet for me. It allowed me to showcase who I was as a person. It allowed me to showcase my personality. Style, music, and writing helped me express myself, while God proved to me that I had a voice!

I’m not perfect; however, I do know that style has allowed me to showcase the boldness that I possess. I can be quite FRANK, if you ask me. (haha). Even further, I’ve recognized this as a gift from God.  

Dear Middle Child: You Are Strong!

Did you know that by being a middle child, I have become a stronger person. I have dealt with sadness. I have learned happiness and found. I’ve learned that God is the one who grants me strength, He is the one who allowed me to have these experiences to prepare me for all that He has for me.

I really think that my past experiences have helped foster my passion for creating this website, using creativity as my outlet. Everyday, God shows me that my hope, strength, and identity only can be found in Him, the creator of the universe.

What did you struggle with as a child? How did you overcome and use that strength today? If you would like to receive updates about the journeys of women across the world SUBSCRIBE HERE!